Wednesday, June 16, 2010

My feelings

Have not write about my feelings for a long time. Most of the time I don't like to share my feelings with others because I don't want to burden other people with my troubles. But now feeling kinda stressed so gonna write something.

Why is it people that we care about always listen to other people's talk rather than us. I always hate the aunties that like to gossip "When is your son gonna get a car??"..."When is your son gonna get married?". These people add no value to the community, just being slugs and pests. If you have nothing to talk about, just shut the fuck up. Its like their families are in order. But if I start to talk about them, then I am no better than them. The mouth is sharper than a blade, if i stab someone, the injuries will be there for like a month, but I know people who have not spoken to each other for 10 years because of somebody's mouth.

I can't stand those motivation books that tells you how to be nice and communicate with assholes. If you are an asshole, I can be a bigger basterd. The point is, those books always tells us to give way and back up and be nice. Is it really worth it in the end. Or will it erode your soul bit by bit untill you become a mindless zombie (or a backbone-less rat).

I used to love teaching, but now I find its too commercialized up to the point that we wanna have a 100th semester in a year if it is possible. I think you students have seen the effect already, no parking lot, classes until 8 pm, library always full and so on. And now they have this system where you should achieve 70% pass in the finals. The funny thing is, if the student is expected to fail, he or she will be asked to drop the subject that semester. CAN YOU TELL ME WHAT THE FUCK IS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THIS AND THE HEADMASTER THAT DOES NOT ALLOW THE STUDENTS TO SIT FOR SPM SO THEIR PASSING RATE ARE NOT AFFECTED. I am just wondering who will be my last batch of students. Don't worry, I still love you all, no matter what happens in the future. People always hope things get better, but usually they get worse.

I was reading the news and it seems more and more people are commiting suicide, even Muslims. According to Islam, suicides are forbidden and considered one of the largest sins, so what is wrong here? Failure of religion to keep up with the times or failure of the people who propagate the religion to keep up with the times. I would say its the case of the latter than of the former. Whenever people do wrong like dumping babies, eloping, leaving parents at old folk home and so on, some religious person would say "That's wrong and God will punish you". Come on, even a kid can say that. Can you come up with a solution to that problem is what I want to see, then I will have a world of respect on you. A. Samad Said in the novel "Salina" also said the same thing. Go read it.

Two of my Dockers pants were torn this month, I wonder whether the quality of the pants has gone down since they were made in Cambodia now? I still had my first Dockers which I bought in 1999, and its still in one piece. So today I went looking for pants, I went to Dockers (again), but after careful considerations, I decided to try another brand just to see their quality. I went to G2000, but it seems they were lacking salesman =.=, so decided not to try that. I hate it when salesman follow you around, but hate it more when you wanna buy something, then there is no one around. Finally bought 2 Padini pants for RM100. Not bad at all....

My head is pounding, gonna rest soon. Good night out there, whatever you are.

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