Friday, December 24, 2010

Lady Ninja Kaede

I was browsing through some DVD at the shop when I saw this DVD. I knew I was in trouble because I have a soft spot with movies that have the word "Lady Ninja", "Highschool Girl", "Chainsaw" or "Zombie". So I decided to buy it.
Lady Ninja Kaede is a ninja with big boobs that seems to pop out when she jumps. That is the main attraction of the movie. Even on the trailer ther mention her vital statistics.
Ahem, back to the story. In the era of the shogun, there was a rise in sex crimes.
A female ninja, imprisoned by the Shogun who fears her skill hear the news with trouble. Her attack style is sexual attack. She is not really imprisoned but confined to a temple.
I always thought Japan was a bit cold to wear like that???
Um, I don't think that's how you heal chest pain. Anyway she tries her charm on her guard which does not work for some reason that will be revealed later. Ok, he is gay.

Meanwhile, two sisters
She is married to an ex-samurai.
One day while visiting Kaede, she was attacked and raped by an unknown attacker.
That's the most fake looking sword that I have ever seen.
Later she committed suicide.
It was revealed later that her husband betrayed her and sold her off, and he has done this twice before. Now he set his target to Kaede and decided to kill his contact that knows his secret.
.
Meanwhile the ninja at the temple read about it in the local "newspaper" and decided to investigate.
Meanwhile the ex-samurai was about to kill his contact but was interrupted by the ninja.
Ninja interrogation techniques. Really WTF.
She does have nice breasts

Get ready for more WTF moment
Isn't there an easier way of getting confession, like crush his fingers or burn his testicles?

The ex-samurai denied it and Kaede believed him but the ninja has still another trick up her sleeve.
The ex-samurai makes his move on Kaede.
Actually its not a ghost but the ninja in disguise.
They wanted to capture him alive.
Kaede stabbed the ex-samurai and was arrested for murder which brings a death sentence.
They faked her execution and the sex punisher division was set up, to punish sex offenders.

Thus start the story of Lady Ninja Kaede. Actually its better than Lady Ninja Kasumi in its story lol.

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1 comment:

Anonymous said...

That was an. Awesome. Review. Great sense of humor!